Personally, like Ettina, I think (or like to think) that I am good with cats. But all that means is that I usually know what body language to look for, have exhibited the patience and coaxing ability to get shy or wary cats to be willing to approach me and be petted, and know that my cats like me. I *definitely* am aware that all cats are different (witness my parents’ cats: Thor, who is a total sook and *loves* attention, and Mew, who sometimes wants attention, but only on *his* terms, and tends to be a *lot* more stand-offish with people). It definitely doesn’t mean that I can’t make mistakes. Luckily, my cats have all been quite forgiving of mistakes made (well, I call them my cats – I suspect that I’m more “their human”), so we’ve all gotten along well.

I suspect that I see animals as “people”, much as I see humans as “people”. Not cat-shaped or dog-shaped humans, but individuals with their own personalities, likes and dislikes, and…. *sighs* Can’t think of the rest of what I was saying there. And humans don’t tend to have the same hunting instincts as cats: I’ve seen Mew play with a mouse, and while I haven’t seen the results, I know that he often brings dead birds and mice into the house to eat; and for some reason, I *adore* seeing Imber tear into her “Kickeroo” (really just a fabric log with a “tail” of a different, “furry” fabric), and treat it like prey. Humans don’t tend to do that. Any more than they sniff each other’s butts to get information on who this other being is and what sort of physical state they’re in.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that, as far as I know, I see cats as cats – and as “people” – and humans as humans – and “people” – but know that they are two very different “types” of people.

So, my more $2. *shrugs*

;) tagAught

Your second comment reminds me of a cartoon I once saw. In this drawing there were a bunch of animals (I think all were characters in some common comic strip but I don’t remember the name of it.) One of the animals in the strip yells out, “Duck!” in clear warning that there is something flinging through the air at about head height (I don’t remember what, maybe a mud pie or something). Several animals heed the warning and do duck their heads down. The thing flinging through the air whizzes above their heads. But then there is a duck who clearly thinks someone is trying to call his name because he calls back, “What!?” and turns his head to face directly toward the hurtling object ….

PS: My comments is a bit late, but when I first read it, I just didn’t know how to put my thoughts into words, and then they became clearer after reading some of Anne C’s “catlaborations”.
I’m so looking forward to more on this from both of you.

I tend to get anxious when it comes to blogs or discussions by parents of children with disabilities in general. Because so many of them involve relentless projecting, of the sort that even a child without any disability-related communication problems can have trouble contradicting (adults have a lot of power, and it can be hard to go against what all the authority figures are telling you about yourself). And I remember being younger and being projected at like that, and picking up some really damaging ideas about myself (either believing the somewhat-prejudiced things I was told, or believing there was something wrong with me when my experience didn’t fit what everyone told me it was). And I don’t want to project at other people’s kids, but the parents often say really similar things that sound less like reflections of their children as individuals, and more like parroting conventional wisdom on What Children With This Disability Are Like or What People With This Disability Are Like. And any disabled adults pointing this out tend to be treated as picking on parents or bullying.

What do you all think? Should I quit asking next time? I’ve been thinking about how I feel when I’m having trouble speaking and explaining what’s wrong and it doesn’t help me to have someone ask multiple times what’s wrong. But then he’s a dog and doesn’t understand those words the same way I do (?) so I don’t know if it would make the situation worse for him or not.

As to feeling unworthy – I feel this a lot. Especially because I know I have used my power over him in ways I shouldn’t and I feel terrible for it. I feel guilty sometimes when I put his harness and leash on to take him outside.

I’m looking forward to part three.

I was watching him, so he stopped looking at the fly and trying to catch it after a while…..possibly because he didn’t want to keep missing in front of an audience…

The thing about mistakes though is generally the worst thing she could do to me either on purpose or accidentally is make me need stitches and antibiotics. The worst mistake I make could kill her, even if the mistake didn’t involve violence. That’s a pretty impressive power differential which is my next topic.