Comments on: Holiday “joy”, and assorted communication stuff.

By: laurentius-rex

laurentius-rex — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 20:58:05 +0000

As unpaid “staff”

not only were my holidays working ones, but I could not be ill or have an accident either.

By: n.

n. — Wed, 02 Jan 2008 16:39:25 +0000

i agree with storybellz about how they should just read your blog. i think maybe you said some of them had(?). but *would* they read it, regularly enough to know stuff?

By: andreashettle

andreashettle — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 20:27:43 +0000

Okay, that makes sense, thanks. Fight versus flight: both involve adrenaline but the outward appearance is quite different.

By: ballastexistenz

ballastexistenz — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 16:24:34 +0000

Andrea, I expect it has something to do with anger generally resulting in going towards something, and fear with going away from it.

By: Ettina

Ettina — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 23:02:54 +0000

Anger and fear are nearly the same biochemically. Presumably they are different on some higher level, however. I don’t really know.

By: andreashettle

andreashettle — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 03:49:08 +0000

Ivan: Could it maybe be the adrenaline produced by anger doing something to give you the “boost” you need to get certain things done?

Though if it’s adrenaline, wouldn’t fear produce that too … ?? And I see you and Amanda both mentioning anger as a help but not fear as a help. So maybe some other aspect of biochemistry … ? I don’t know enough about biology to guess. If Ettina is reading this, I wonder if she has the background knowledge to make a better educated guess (not quite “rare genetic syndromes” I know, but it’s biology at least)

By: Ivan

Ivan — Mon, 31 Dec 2007 02:33:38 +0000

Sometimes I have to get mad in order to get things I need to do done. I wonder what it is about being angry……that makes things happen/makes one think of important things…….is it the feeling of anger itself…..or something about the specific kind of mental energy that anger causes? I’m sure I’ve subconsciously thought about this question at some point, but only because of reading your response to another poster, was I able to come up with these words to ask the question.

Ivan

By: Arla

Arla — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 23:12:51 +0000

I had that problem in supported housing. Staff around nearly every day and even when I did manage to say things needed doing often it wasn’t noted or acted on. Despite how very hard it was to put it out there. But hey, I’m verbal and mobile so I’m capable, right?!

It’s happened to me at GP appointments that I’ve handed over a note with say three issues on it and only one has been dealt with. Of course I’ve been unable to complain.

Sometimes I’ve been to GPs several times over a year or so and there is some longstanding thing that still hasn’t been given any attention. Thankfully, as yet, nothing life threatening!

It’s one reason I don’t persue the possibility of having support staff these days. At least I generally muddle through now on my own. Some things don’t happen but enough gets done to maintain life and tenancy (and cat!). Long may it continue, because what if it didn’t??

By: Philip

Philip — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 15:17:39 +0000

I would very much not want to need paid staff for my everyday living needs. I value my independence and privacy. But needing them would not be far along the path, as it were, from where I am now as regards my living skills abilities. It is possible that some time in the future I will need support staff, but I would try to manage by myself as long as possible.

I find it easy to imagine myself in the situation you were in, Amanda, before you got paid staff for everyday tasks. And being in that situation would frighten me.

By: ballastexistenz

ballastexistenz — Sun, 30 Dec 2007 06:16:37 +0000

Yeah, and then even if I want to ask for help and know I need help and have no problem asking for help and don’t think there’s anything wrong with asking for help, I just can’t keep that many things consciously in my head, so they aren’t there when I need to say them.

It’s the old, “It’s not there unless it’s triggered” thing.

Except occasionally I get really mad and come out with this rant that stuns everyone with being a seemingly endless list of things that need to get done that nobody’s even heard of because I couldn’t say them before. (And the only way I can keep the amount of energy required to say it all is to remain really angry, and then I usually end up crying afterwards because it’s not that I’m actually mad as much as that I’m terrified that I’m the only one that knows this stuff and then I have to be mad in order to be able to push it all out, but then I’ve gone into overdrive and it’s a mess.)