Comments on: What You Know

By: bint alshamsa

bint alshamsa — Wed, 01 Aug 2007 04:41:47 +0000

My daughter has ADD and I’ve found that Ettina’s strategy works best with her too. We call it “getting the monkey out”. When she’s allowed to take frequent breaks to jump around and doodle, the whole task goes better than if we try to make her stay perfectly still all the way until it’s done. Doing the latter may work at first but after “re-directing” her a couple of times, things go down-hill really quickly and often results in us having to give up on it completely that day.

By: Rachel Hibberd

Rachel Hibberd — Tue, 12 Jun 2007 06:11:15 +0000

This post gave me a whole new perspective. I always knew I didn’t like ABA, but I wasn’t very sure why. Duh. Thanks.

By: diana carr

diana carr — Fri, 23 Feb 2007 21:16:34 +0000

i have no web site.i just want to here from this amazing women who has shown me so much more about autism. and i sure want to learn more. diana carr

By: Rick Kayser

Rick Kayser — Thu, 15 Feb 2007 22:23:53 +0000

“You’re like her” I do what she did, but I don’t know what else to do. The young man that I work with , I always thought that we exchanged sun light to shadow , but your words seem so accurate.
I “block”, and I know that I do, and I filter and interpret(try) and explain(try)- but what can I do?

By: Jace

Jace — Sat, 03 Feb 2007 15:12:08 +0000

there comes a point where acceptance and tolerance are far more valuable than “help.”

i was bullied constantly. It never ended. i was bullied by my boss and lost my job after the bullying resulted in PTSD. The organization didn’t care. My rights were nowhere to be found. The union did nothing but talk.

They say it is harder to care than to cure. It’s a saying, and it doesn’t work literally. It means “It’s harder to accept and understand than it is to expect the person to change to suit social standards.”

i’m sick of changing for them. It’s time they change for me.

http://dysamoria.com/blog

By: Diana Ortiz García

Diana Ortiz García — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 15:08:32 +0000

I have been working with Autistic children for 7 years and read about Autism advocacy at the beginning of this journey. Made me feel bad about the way we, as “behavioral tutors” control and “help” these children become accepted within the social norms. I also provide audio therapy and color therapy. Can anybody tell me if this approach is as bad as behavioral modification?

By: Christina

Christina — Thu, 25 Jan 2007 22:52:36 +0000

I would hope to be forgiven for treating people unlike me as Unpeople. Especially considering, as many have already said, that I was bullied a lot when younger, specifically when in High School. I can understand only a hair, but I think that is a place to start. Thank you for writing. Thank you for your videos. You are helping me not to view autistic people as concepts or what they say as symbolic, the list goes on. I would love to hear from you. You are a fantastic writer, I’m envious.

By: Ettina

Ettina — Sat, 20 Jan 2007 13:14:26 +0000

Today I was working with this one autistic boy who also has some form of syndrome. His teacher aide person kept reminding him to put his tongue back in his mouth and stopped him whenever he flapped his hands. I felt uncomfortable about her nagging him because I hate it when people do that with me, but I didn’t say anything. However, when I was with him and she was just watching from the side, I didn’t pay any attention to where his tongue was and when he flapped his hands, I flapped back (which fascinated him, and he would flap some more in reply). He had been trying to stim every couple minutes when she was stopping him, but after I let him flap as much as he wanted to he seemed to need to do it less.
I also did a similar interaction with him in the pool, when he’d splash and I’d splash back. But from what his teacher aide said I think she did that with him when she went swimming as well.

By: bullet

bullet — Sun, 14 Jan 2007 07:32:06 +0000

I was verbally bullied for years at school. I was very withdrawn, my reposnse was to sit and stare at the wall and not react. I was screaming inside. They would say things like “if I was her I’d kill myself”. It worries me that my sons will also be bullied and I will do everything I can to help them understand that if they are bullied they are allowed to retaliate if they can. I couldn’t, I only wish I could have done so.
I know with my autistic son that there could be numerous incidents when I could have made him upset if I’d have gone along with what was expected in mainstream society. Making him sit with other children in a circle to play “pass the parcel rather than letting him run round a room, for example. Or demanding that he looks at me when I’m talking. Or making him eat his food with his fork or spoon rather than his fingers. Or returning him to his bed instead of letting him do his puzzles. Or making him do hours of therapy instead of realising he’s probably tired of structured activities after nursery.
I’ve got a long way to go and I’ll never presume to completely understand either of my children. But I do understand that whilst I can speculate about what they are thinking, or experiencing, I can never know for sure.

By: Kristina

Kristina — Sun, 14 Jan 2007 00:38:36 +0000

This post — esp. the bullying part — rings relevant for a lot of reasons, esp. for the violence and the violent intent beneath the bullying.

Bullies are far harder to teach to have “better behavior” than Charlie, I have to say.